How not to pickpocket an assassin
by Sarcasticcaviar
Summary: Leonard learns the hard way that if you steal from an assassin, you must suffer the consequences. But what if the consequences aren't all bad?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Legends of Tomorrow of any characters associated.**

* * *

Here's the truth; I only half listened to Rip's latest ramblings. I know that sound awful but it's the same thing every time. Stop Savage, yeah we get it. And besides, this was just a recon mission which is nothing I haven't done before.

So, as I sat on the bench in the costume room looking for what to wear, I tried to remember if there was any catch to this event. Crap, I remembered the catch- I had to have Leonard as my date. Look, I tried to explain to Rip that if Leonard and I were put on this mission, I was not responsible for anything that happened. But of course, he didn't listen- typical. Well, if Snart was going to be my date, then I was going to make him suffer. I planned on wearing a dress so red-hot and elegant, it would shut him up or at the very least wipe that smug smirk off his face. All I had to do was find out his favorite color, and that was easily solved.

"Gideon, what is Leonard's favorite color, the specific shade too please."

"Well Miss Lance, it appears that 's favorite color is a shade known as ice blue."

"Thank you Gideon. Also, is it possible for you to custom make a dress?"

"Yes, I can make anything you like."

"Sweet. Here's what I want."

Your move Snart.

In addition to the dress I had one dainty diamond necklace, some simple diamond earrings, and modest nude pumps. The dress didn't have any sparkles which meant that all of the attention would be on the shape. And I'll be damned if I didn't go through however many years of League training without having a smoking hot body on the other side. The neckline plunged, but not overly so. It fit in all the right places up top and flared just slightly at the end. And of course, it was that son of a bitch's favorite color. Thank God there was another girl on board because being left alone with my hair and makeup for something like this does not go well usually. Kendra did my hair in a simple updo, along with a subtle beige smokey eye and pastel lip. Needless to say, I was going to be more than a little upset if he didn't notice me.

It was at this point that Kendra asked me if I had a thing for Snart. I told her that no, I didn't, I was just trying to make it so that he got distracted and screwed up the mission so that I never had to do recon with him again. What she didn't see though, was the wheels turning in my head. What if I did have feelings towards him? After all, if I really wanted to make him mad, I would show up in the ugliest dress possible. I perished the thought to my subconscious for the moment.

"Ok you're all done. I will say mission accomplished. If you wanted to distract him, you have reached your goal."

Of course I thought she was just saying that, all girls do. That was until I looked in the mirror at the finished product that was me. Even I gasped at myself. If I didn't have to worry about mascara, would've shed a tear. Sometimes the killer took over and I truly forgot that above all I was a human, a woman, and a beautiful one at that. These times really helped bring that back though and I'm glad part of the team was here for that.

When Kendra left, I was able to add the final touch to my outfit. After the last of the knives were stashed throughout my outfit, I headed down to meet my date for the evening. Turns out though that I wasn't the only one who dressed to the nines. I hated to admit it, but Leonard leaning against the door, adjusting his watch, was kinda sexy. It also looked like he had planned to seduce me too, judging from the way he smirked when he caught me looking at him. Or maybe it was just me that he was smirking at. He did do a very slow once over before reacting in any way, although I'm pretty sure he was shocked, he just didn't show it.

"Why so dressed up Lance, got a hot date or something?"

"Yeah, something like that. Let's get our party on, shall we crook?"

"Lead the way gorgeous."

And if I wasn't mistaken, I was sure he actually meant it. Which meant that the way I was feeling inside and the rose color my cheeks shaded was totally appropriate.

* * *

 **A/N: Part two will be coming soon, so don't forget to tell me what you think!**


	2. Chapter 2

As we stepped out of the limo, with Stein as our chauffeur, I couldn't help but feeling a little like royalty. I had never been to this kind of thing other than on recon but this time it felt different. Maybe it was the fact that I had a dress that would put actual princesses to shame. Or, maybe it was the fact that I finally had a date that I couldn't stand in the best way possible.

Once we were inside, all we had to do was locate the secret room where Savage was keeping the serum that he used to give his minions a taste of immortality. It sounded easy enough but knowing Rip, it was never really that easy. The hard part of the mission this time was that the place was larger and grander than anything I have ever seen- including the Queen Mansion. We somehow had to look around all of these rooms without getting caught.

"Ok so here's the plan. We're gonna pull the usual trick of the drunk couple looking for some place to get lucky. It worked last time with Rip but I'm hoping Savage changed the guards so we don't have to worry about them not falling for it. Got it?"

"So are we going to actually get drunk or are you one of those prudes who can't fight with a little alcohol in her system?"

"All I know is I'm not letting this champagne go to waste."

"Sounds like a plan."

And true to my word, I did not let a single drop of it go to waste. Nobody can really blame me though, I mean what's a girl to do with endless champagne at somebody else's expense? After I had made sure that Snart was at least a little tipsy, I asked him to dance.

"Care to dance?"

"Um, no. I don't dance Lance. I thought the 70's cleared that issue up."

"Come on, one little dance won't kill you. And don't forget that you're my date and if we want the whole drunk hookup thing to work, we need to sell it that you are at least a little bit interested in me."

"Fine, one dance."

He led me onto the floor and sure enough, Leonard Snart actually knew how to dance. As we swayed in time, I could hear his heart beating and for once, I was at peace. Until I felt something on my shoulder. Oh boy was he in for it now. I don't know why in his right mind he thought he could slip the knife from my dress strap without me noticing. I didn't say anything in the moment, only because I was plotting my revenge in my head.

Later, as the party was in full swing, we decided to pull our little stunt. I pulled my fake but slightly real drunk stumble and put on my best bimbo laugh. To my surprise, Leonard actually did a convincing job of the role of the drunk about to get lucky playboy. Maybe it was because he had done this in the past. Either way, I didn't want to know.

We finally found the guards and they strictly pointed us back to the main rooms, which meant we had found the secret lair. Before we went back to the Waverider though, I had one little loose end to tie up.

When we had gotten out of sight the guards and around the corner, I took my shot at revenge. I shoved him up against the wall and kissed him so passionately that I think he might have gone dizzy. He did kiss me back though and I let it go on for awhile for two reasons. One was that I needed to distract him while I slipped my knife out of his coat pocket. Two was that it felt so right, I wondered if there maybe was a thing between us. I mean, everybody else had already said something about it, so it was possible that they were seeing something that we weren't. Either way, I let my mind wander to the daydream of being with him, and it wasn't as appalling as I expected. It actually was kind of nice. I remembered my mission though and pulled my head out of the clouds.

I could feel him shuddering as I whispered in his ear. "If you ever try to steal from me again, I'll use this knife to slit your throat."

And with that, I took my exit. It was time to go anyways and also for dramatic effect and what not. A little part of me expected him to follow me, but when I turned around he hadn't moved an inch.

"Are you coming or not?"

"Yeah, I'm just wondering when you're going to give me back my wallet."

Obviously he noticed, even I knew that he would notice. But, apparently I had more than alcohol in my system than previously expected because I took it with the intention of having a reason to talk to him. And although I have no recollection of what I said next, Snart remembers quite well.

"Well then, I guess you'll just have to come get it later." After I replied with that and a smirk, I made my final exit.

Luckily he didn't say anything as we left the party, which gave me time to plan my escape from the Waverider. Before I packed my bags and ran off into the night, he knocked on my door.

"About that wallet."

As I gave it back to him, I could see the wheels turning. When he spoke, he was softer than usual, the snark was gone.

"I meant what I said earlier, about you. That doesn't mean you aren't pretty all the time, you just looked especially beautiful tonight."

Ok, now I had to stop myself from tearing up. "Thank you. You Like the dress? I had Gideon custom make it."

And old Sara decided that now was the time to make her grand reappearance because my mouth started moving before I knew what I was saying. "That's not the only thing I had made in this color."

"Prove it."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hey guys I wanted to give you a quick update on this story. So the deal was that this was only supposed to be a two-shot but since so many of you guys followed it, (which I love by the way!) I've decided to keep posting on this story. So where I go from here is pretty much up to you guys; I was thinking I would maybe post my captain canary one-shots and drabbles on here. If you guys want me to stay on this theme or if you have other ideas, don't be afraid to comment or pm me! I'm always down for suggestions. Thank you all so much for reading this, you're the best!**


End file.
